All these girls.

'I was faded; couldn't find my feet.' - Atlas Genius

  I'm not sure what exactly what it was, but today I lost my determination. I saw everyone overtaking me on the track and suddenly got worried that I wasn't running fast enough. We were all drenched from the downpour, yet everyone performed so well. Then there was the minority (AKA me) who managed to suffer towards the end. I thought it was my leg joint starting to give way, but if I examine it now it could be the lack of attitude. In all honesty, I'm a little disappointed with myself.

  I've always had a problem with PE class, because simply put, I'm unfit. Though, there are so many contradictory questions. Whatever happened to 'going at your own pace'? Why do we compete in sports? What about people like me who don't strive for the best, but simply want to be happy with our own progress?

  I can't help comparing myself to people when it comes to things like these. I wouldn't call it so much of an insecurity, as I don't necessarily beat myself up about it. I know the encouraging shouts from friends and others were meant to be positive, but somehow they weighed me down. I just stopped and I felt so embarrassed. Though after having Fiona be amazingly supportive, I felt ten times better. (Thanks Fiona, if you're reading this. You make me proud to be your friend.)

  I like people. People make me happy, most of the time. So instead of ranting and making you, as a reader, feel bad, I'm going to shut up and keep running until it kills me. 

  Hang in there guys, Friday's right around the corner. Ciao.

YOU CAN ALSO FIND ME ON BLOGLOVIN // GFC // INSTAGRAM // SOUNDCLOUD // SPOTIFY